Episode 28 - Kasamatsu's Haunted House

[Cut to the Saito residence. Spring has just arrived and the streets are busy with activity. Inside his family's apartment, Saito is trying, with limited success, to show Kasuga how to use a program on his personal computer.]

Kasuga:
[Typing on a simple word-processor.] Control C to copy... [Moves cursor down more lines.] ahh...[Trails off.]

Saito:
Control V to paste

Kasuga:
Ah right. Control C to copy, control X to cut.

Saito:
Don't hit Alt-X or you'll lose it. Save it and let me check my mail.

Computer:
[After Saito hits the command to download mail.]
   Message  1:
   From chun-li@ugrad.edu.butsumetsu.ac.jp Sat Mar 9 09:12:46 1989
   Date: Thurs, 9 Mar 1989 09:12:52 +0900 (GMT)
   Subject: Re:  Date
   To: baka@ugrad.cs.butsumetsu.ac.jp

Baka-chan:

I'm sorry you couldn't join me at the school pre-season baseball game. I'm sure whatever you were doing must have been important.

I still have high hopes in meeting you in person for a date. We still have a few weeks before the semester starts. If you can, I'd like to meet you for a mid-day matinee at the Shinjuku Palace movie theater for the showing of "Rojaa Rabbitto".

Chun-Li

Saito:
[With anticipation.] I knew it!

Kasuga:
What?

Saito:
I've finally got a date! "Chun-Li" wants to go see a movie with me!

Kasuga:
[Nervously.] Isn't this the same girl who stood you up in the park last summer? Maybe she isn't what she...

[Before Kasuga can finish, Kasamatsu comes barging in.]

Kasamatsu:
Hey guys! I have some really important news!

Saito:
[Annoyed.] Couldn't you have knocked?

Kasamatsu:
This is really important! My grandfather passed away a couple of days ago!

Saito:
[Freezes momentarily, then remorsefully.] Oh...s-sorry...

Kasamatsu:
[Calms down.] Don't worry so much about it. He had a long and happy life. [Gets excited again.] But what's really exciting is that he's leaving me his estate and holdings! The letter says he has a hundred million! All I have to do is to go to the estate and take care of some kind of conditions. What's more, it says to bring along some friends!

Kasuga:
Ojiisan? What about your parents?

Kasamatsu:
The letter says that they're being handled separately. Apparently, ojiichan singled me out for something special!

Kasuga:
[To Saito after taking a moment to think.] Don't you think that's kind of strange that he'd make separate arrangements for his grandson?

Saito:
[Suspiciously.] It's very strange. It's probably some kind of practical joke.

Kasamatsu:
[Frustrated.] Come on! Do you really think I'd play a joke about my own family?

[Kasuga and Saito look at him with deadpan expressions.]

Kasamatsu:
[Red-faced.] Well...this time I'm not! [Hands the letter over.] See for yourselves.

Saito:
[Snatches the offered letter and begins reading.]
Kasamatsu Teruhiko:

We regret to inform you that Kasamatsu Hiroshi passed away in his sleep last night. It is necessary for you to come to Niigata Prefecture to settle his worldly affairs as he has seen fit to leave you 100,000,000 of his estate. Please contact our office to arrange a meeting time.

Because of the importance of this event, you are strongly encouraged to bring your friends and associates to participate. Your parents will be attending a separate service.

Sincerely,

Shinpai Law Offices.

Kasuga:
[Looking over Saito's shoulder.] I guess he's not kidding.

Saito:
Well, that's fine. I guess you're rich now. Hope it doesn't spoil you rotten...

Kasamatsu:
Oh, no chance! [Puts one arm each around Kasuga and Saito.] I'm counting on you guys showing up with me!

Kasuga:
Eh? But it's only a week before the semester starts! Ayukawa and I were going to spend some time at the recreation center tomorrow.

Saito:
Un, some of us have other plans! I, for one, have a date!

Kasamatsu:
But you've got to come! You two are supposed to be my friends! What if I have to invite friends over to get the inheritance? What if there's some kind of difficulty? I'll even split some of the money with you!

Saito:
[Hesitates, then relents.] I swear... [Starts typing a response onto the computer.] I can't believe I'm canceling a date to watch you inherit money.

[Cut to Seishun-kan. Saito, Kasuga and Kasamatsu walk up the central walkway and enter the house.]

Kasuga:
[Heading upstairs.] Just a minute. I need to call Ayukawa and tell her where I'm going. Maybe she'll join us.

Saito:
Sure.

[Kasuga goes upstairs and enters his room. After pulling his phone out from under a pile of old laundry, he dials a number. As he does so, Katsu knocks on his door.]

Kasuga:
[Opens the door and motions Katsu in, while holding the phone.] Ayukawa? It's Kasuga...ah...something's come up and I can't come to the rec center tomorrow. [Pause.] Well, Kasamatsu-san's ojiisan passed away and he says he needs us to settle his legal affairs. [Pause.] Sure, you can come...he did say he needed to have his friends there. [Pauses.] OK, we'll be on the Joetsu Shinkansen* this afternoon. [Pauses.] Ja mata. [Hangs up.]

*bullet train

Katsu:
Eh? Kasamatsu's ojiisan passed away?

Kasuga:
[Nods.] He says he left him a lot of money and he needs us at the will reading this evening.

Katsu:
[Rolls his eyes.] That weirdo with a ton of money? I wonder what kind of grand schemes are going through his mind now? So I guess we're not playing tennis tomorrow then?

Kasuga:
Ayukawa's going to join us. If you want, I guess you could come too.

[Cut back to the first floor of the boarding house.]

Saito:
You know, even if you do get all that money, you still couldn't buy a date.

Kasamatsu:
Oh yeah? [Confidently.] It's all in the approach. They don't call me "Smooth with the ladies" for nothing.

Saito:
[Dubiously.] Sure they do.

Kasamatsu:
Oh, yeah? Watch and learn. [Knocks on the door to Room #2.] Ah, Yoko. We're here to invite you and your sister Yuko to come watch me become rich!

Yuko:
[Deadpan.] I'm Yuko.

Saito:
[Amused tone as he whispers into Kasamatsu's ear.] Smooth...

Kasamatsu:
[Whispers back.] U-urusai*...!

*Be quiet

Yuko:
Yoko is in the backyard working out. She always does that when she's upset.

[Cut to the backyard. Like most of the surrounding houses, the back yard is small, with only a single tree in the middle of a small plot of land fenced for privacy. Roped to the tree is an old worn out mattress which is currently under assault by Yoko. Oblivious to the attention of others, she continues to punch and kick the mattress until finally fatigue takes over and she collapses backwards onto the lawn to catch her breath. However, her rest is interrupted as Kasamatsu walks towards her and bends over.]

Kasamatsu:
[Pulls his lips apart and sticks out his tongue.] Bee...!

[Yoko grimaces, then with one quick move, seizes Kasamatsu's nose and twists.]

Kasamatsu:
[Squeals in pain.] OWOWOWOW...! LEGGOLEGGO!!

[After a few seconds, Yoko releases Kasamatsu.]

Kasamatsu:
[Rubbing his now-sore nose.] Che*..! I was hoping you'd be too tired to do that this time!

*Mild Japanese expression of disappointment/irritation

Yoko:
[Coldly as she gets up.] I always leave a little extra for clowns like you.

Kasamatsu:
Well, you'd better start treating me right! We're on our way to my ojiichan's will reading. In a couple of days, I'll be rich!

Yoko:
[Dubious.] You? Rich?

Kasamatsu:
That's right, rich! [Leering expression.] I'll have girls around me just like Hayashibara-san!

Yoko:
[Deadpan as she looks at Kasamatsu's oversized stomach.] You have a long way to go before you're close to being like Hayashibara-san...

Saito:
[To Yuko.] So how long was she out here?

Yuko:
Over an hour this time. She's really upset.

Saito:
[Half-heartedly.] Not that it's unusual, but what's got her so sore?

Yuko:
[Whispering.] Yoko's "mystery boyfriend" cancelled out on another date. Something about a favor for a friend.

Saito:
[Amused expression.] Maybe he's just afraid of getting his head caved in when she's disappointed...

Yuko:
[Offended.] Chigau*!

*Mistake

[Cut to the Joetsu Shinkansen. Ayukawa, Kasuga, Saito, Katsu, Kasamatsu, and both Miyasato's are seated in adjacent rows. After the food-service girl leaves, conversations resume.]

Katsu:
Eh? So your ojiisan was a good sport?

Kasamatsu:
Oh sure! I mean, he was always a sucker for my best practical jokes! I'd test out everything on him before unleashing them on other people, just to make sure they'd work.

Katsu:
[Nervously.] Ah...that doesn't sound like something he'd enjoy...

Kasamatsu:
Oh sure, he'd say "I'll get you for that, Terukiho!". [Smugly.] But I was too smart and fast for him!

Ayukawa:
[Disdainfully.] Hrumph...it sounds like you didn't respect him at all. If I were him, I'd be resentful.

Kasamatsu:
It wasn't like that at all. [Puts his hand on Ayukawa's shoulder.] He and I had a very, heh-heh, special relati--ITE*! [Yanks hand away as Ayukawa bends his middle finger backwards.]

*Ouch

Kasuga:
[To Kasamatsu.] Oi!

Kasamatsu:
[Nurses his hand.] What is it with you girls these days...?

Yuko:
[To Yoko.] He is such a sukebe*...

*<Netiquette violator>

Yoko:
[To Yuko.] Just think though...I can't wait to extort all that money out of him...

Kasamatsu:
[Indignantly.] I heard that!

Kasuga:
What are you going to do with all that money anyway?

Kasamatsu:
[Calms down.] Well, I haven't actually thought of it...maybe buy a new computer.

Saito:
What about your parents? They're probably going to have something to say about you inheriting the money.

Kasamatsu:
Don't worry! They don't tell me how to spend my money. Besides, they're in Osaka, visiting the relatives this weekend.

Saito:
Eh? If they're gone too, then who's going to take care of your parrot?

Kasamatsu:
Oh, don't worry about that! Keiko-san agreed to take care of him!

Katsu:
Eh? Why didn't you invite her?

Kasamatsu:
I did, but she said her parents are still a little miffed about her date with Sakurai.

[Cut to Kasamatsu's apartment. Inside, the usual stacks of clutter ranging from computer peripherals to girlie magazines lie in clumps around the room. The only movement in the room is a familiar- looking bird as he struggles in his cage.]

Kimura:
[As she opens the door.] Gomen kudasai*! [Walks in, removes her shoes and enters the main room.] Baka-chan, genki desu ka**?

*Please excuse me (Greeting when visiting.)
**How are you

Baka:
Kono kuso-ttare!*

*<Netiquette violator>

Kimura:
[Turns slightly pale from shock.] Wh-what did you say...?

Baka:
Shinjimae!*

*<Netiquette violator>

Kimura:
[Shakes her head with determination.] No, no...this won't do at all! [Faces Baka.] Baka-chan...repeat after me...

[Cut to Niigata Prefecture. A pair of large taxis pulls up to an old- styled manor located on the top of a hill. Although impressive in size and layout, it is visibly clear that the property has not been maintained. The overcast sky and distant rumbling of thunder underscore the feeling of foreboding. Another car is already parked at the base of the hill.]

Katsu:
Creepy place...

Kasuga:
[Nods.] Un...

Saito:
Wasn't anyone keeping the place up?

Kasamatsu:
That's strange...ojiichan had enough friends and relatives to do so. Maybe he just didn't feel like keeping it clean. [Noting the parked car.] I guess the executors are already here.

[The group walks up the steps to the top of the hill. When they arrive at the front door, Kasamatsu pulls on the old-styled pull-ring. The door gives a loud, deep creaking sound as it opens.]

Kasamatsu:
Gomen kuda...[Trails off.]

[A tall, gaunt man wearing a suit comes to greet them at the door. He looks at them grimly, before ushering them inside.]

Man:
[With a deep intimidating voice.] Konbanwa mina-san*. My name is Aku Hiro. I was Kasamatsu-dono's attorney. I regret that my partner, Youma-san couldn't make it tonight.

*Good evening everybody

Katsu:
[Whispers.] "Aku" and "Youma"? They sure picked the right lawyers for this place!

Ayukawa:
Shh!

Aku:
[To Kasamatsu.] As you know, you and your associates are here in accordance with Kasamatsu-dono's written request. It was his fondest wish that you come here with your close friends. [Pauses for a moment to go through some legal documents.] Kasamatsu-dono was something of an eccentric man with regards to his final arrangements. His only instructions were to play this tape.

[Aku puts the cassette tape into a standard tape player and presses the "play" button. A few seconds later, a coarse but strong voice comes out.]

Tape:
"Konbanwa Teruhiko! This is your Ojiichan talking to you from beyond the grave! [Croons.] Ooooohhh...!

Yoko:
[Mutters.] Like grandfather, like grandson...

Kasamatsu:
[Harshly whispers back while paying attention to the tape.] Would you be quiet?!?

Tape:
"I am prepared to leave the family's property to you. However, as you know, I place a great deal of pride in our family traditions and our historical roots, even in this modern day and age. To make sure you honor them, I've made arrangements for you to spend a little time with the wisdom of our ancestors. However, I also know how much your friends mean to you, so I'll be willing to bend traditions to make it a little easier for you. So here's the deal; all you and your friends have to do is to spend one night in our family manor."

Kasuga:
That doesn't sound too hard...

Tape:
"The house is haunted..."

Kasamatsu:
Haunted?

Ayukawa:
[To herself.] Haunted?! [Shudders slightly.]

Tape:
"...yes, haunted. If you don't stay, then you demonstrate a clear lack of respect for and put shame on our family name! In that event, you'll forfeit your inheritance!"

Kasamatsu:
[Tenses up.] Ano yaro*...!

*<Netiquette violator>

Tape:
"My good friend Aku-san will make the proper arrangements. Sleep well! BWAHAHAHA...!"

[Aku presses the "stop" button and ejects the tape. He carefully places the tape into a cassette holder and seals it.]

Aku:
I'll return in the morning to verify who has stayed the night... [Sinisterly as he heads towards the door.] ...if any! [Deep guttural laugh as an old clock chimes nine o'clock in the evening.] Hahaha...hahaha...BWAHAHA...! [Closes the front door on his way out.]

Everyone except Kasamatsu:
[Frozen in shock.] ...!

Kasamatsu:
[After taking a moment to recover.] Oh, come on, guys! That lawyer's just playing around! He probably gets the money if I chicken out! [Quotes to Saito.] "There's no such thing as ghosts!", remember?

Saito:
But...don't you remember that time at the lake last summer*?

*KOC #10

Kasamatsu:
Sure I remember. I remember you guys laughing at me all the way home because it turned out to be a hallucinatory gas! [Calms down.] Don't worry so much! What could possibly go wrong?

[Lightning flashes in the background followed by the crack of thunder.]


[COMMERCIAL BREAK.]

[A Nissan Pathfinder pulls up to Ikkoku-kan.]

Kyoko:
Mitaka-san, is this a new truck?

Mitaka:
[Opening the door for her.] Yes, I just signed the papers yesterday!

[Souichiro slips his leash and makes a beeline for the open door. Mitaka screams and leaps into the back of the truck as Souichiro jumps in behind the wheel and pulls out, leaving a confused Kyoko standing at the curb.]

Souichiro:
[Adjusting the rear-view mirror.] Bau!

Mitaka:
[As he cringes in the back seat.] GYAAAA!

[CUE MUSIC: "Low Rider"]

[The Pathfinder cruises Tokeizaka, picking up dogs at every opportunity. A pale Mitaka sweats in the back seat, surrounded by more and more dogs. The truck stops to pick up one more dog, but the truck is full. All the dogs' heads swivel to look at Mitaka, who faints.

Kujou Asuna steps over to Mitaka's unconscious body. She is wearing a tweed jacket, driving cap, and tinted sunglasses, and is holding her dog, Salad.]

Asuna:
[Watching the Pathfinder drive away.] Dogs...love...trucks.

[SWELL MUSIC and show Nissan logo.]

[Writer's note: Standard Disclaimer.]

[END COMMERCIAL BREAK.]


[Cut to Niigata Prefecture. Night falls on the Kasamatsu residence as the old clock strikes 10pm. Inside the first spare bedroom, Kasuga and Katsu get ready to go to sleep.]

Katsu:
So do you think this "haunted" stuff is for real?

Kasuga:
Well...I don't know. But Ayukawa was never comfortable with these kinds of stories. I hope she's OK.

[Cut to the second spare bedroom. Ayukawa, Miyasato Yoko and Miyasato Yuko are also getting ready for bed.]

Yoko:
Leave it to that idiot to make us all spend the night in a creepy old house. And to think that I was actually looking forward to this weekend.

Yuko:
[Looking around.] I wonder if this place really is haunted? It's certainly old enough to have a few gho...[Looks at Ayukawa's tense expression.] Ayukawa-san, are you all right?

Ayukawa:
[With effort.] S-sure....[Gets up.] I guess I'll get ready to bed.

[Cut to the master bedroom. Kasamatsu lies down on the master bed as Saito looks through the large bookcase.]

Saito:
Pretty big place. If it weren't so dusty and old, it would look a lot better. [Noting Kasamatsu's dour expression with amusement.] Ojiichan's final revenge, eh?

Kasamatsu:
I can't believe he did this to me!

[Cut to the bathroom. Ayukawa is over the sink, trying to rinse her face and calm down.]

Ayukawa:
[To herself as she watches the sink drain.] It's OK... there's no such things as ghosts...!

Voice:
[Faintly.] Help us...!

Ayukawa:
[Freezes as she looks down the drain.] ...!

Voice:
[Coming from the sink drain pipe.] Help us...!

Ayukawa:
[Feeling both scared and foolish.] Who's there...?

Voice:
We're disembodied spirits! We're all the kids who've died here! We all float in the void...

Ayukawa:
[Starts slowly backing away towards the door, shaking with fear.] ...!

Voice:
[Turns menacing.] ...and when you're down here with us, you'll float too...!

Ayukawa:
[Runs back towards the bedroom.] KYAAAA...!

[Cut to the first spare bedroom.]

Kasuga:
[As he hears her scream.] Ayukawa!

[Both Kasuga and Katsu come running out of the bedroom and are quickly joined by Saito and Kasamatsu in front of the door to the second bedroom. Ignoring standard etiquette, Kasuga comes rushing into the girls' room, and finds Ayukawa stumbling out of the bathroom.]

Miyasato-tachi:
[In unison as they watch Kasuga come to Ayukawa's side.] Ayukawa-san!

Ayukawa:
[Shaking as she points towards the sink.] T-the sink!!

[As Kasuga tries to calm Ayukawa down, Katsu looks tentatively down the drain.]

Katsu:
I don't see anything. Did a bug crawl out of the pipe or something?

Ayukawa:
[After taking a moment to calm down.] I thought I heard... I thought.... umm... never mind.

[Cut to later that night. Saito and Kasamatsu are returning towards the master bedroom.]

Saito:
Ayukawa-san really looked scared. Do you suppose this ghost thing might be real?

Kasamatsu:
[Lacking sincerity.] Wh-what are you talking about? [Gets into one side of the bed.] She probably saw a cricket or something; you know girls.

Saito:
[Going through some books in the bookcase.] Did your ojiichan really read all these books?

Kasamatsu:
[Turns his back on Saito and lies back on the bed.] Well, I don't know. He was so old and senile, he probably never opened them. But I know he collected them; there's a big library upstairs, with tapestries, suits of armor and what not. I really...

[As Kasamatsu talks, Saito pulls one book in particular - and the bookcase spins around its axis. When it has returned to its original position, Saito is nowhere to be seen.]

Kasamatsu:
...have no idea what he... [Turns back towards the bookcase and trails off when he sees Saito is no longer in the room.] Ken'ichi? [With false defiance.] I-If you're trying to scare me, it isn't working! [Lies back down.] I'm going to sleep now and I'm not going to leave you any of the bed! [Waits for a moment.] Hmph.

[Cut back to girls' bedroom. Kasuga and Katsu are leaving.]

Kasuga:
You're sure you will be all right? I mean, this *is* an old dark house, so...

Yoko:
[Sarcastically.] Next thing he'll say, Ayukawa-san, is that you should stay in his room, so he'd be able to protect you!

[Ayukawa blushes.]

Kasuga:
[Indignantly.] That's not what I mean!

Ayukawa:
I... I guess we'll be all right. It's not that scary when the lights are on, and if we leave them on, then everything should be alri...

[There's a flash of lightning outside, followed by a rumble of thunder. Then, from nowhere in particular, a ghoulish laughter fills the room. It gets louder and louder and then it dies abruptly. The next moment, all the lights go off. The room is illuminated only by the blue flashes of lightning from outside.]

Ayukawa:
KYAAAA!!

Katsu:
It's ok! It's ok! The fuse must have burned out!

Yoko:
[Fearfully.] What about that scary laughing?! Explain that!

Katsu:
[Lamely.] Ahh...the wind...probably...

Yuko:
[Fearfully.] So? Don't just stand there! You're the egghead, fix the fuse!

Katsu:
[With less confidence.] I... I don't know where anything is here. We should ask Kasamatsu... after all, he's been here before.

Kasuga:
That's probably a good idea. Let's ask him.

Ayukawa:
[Trembling.] Please, be careful. Watch where you step, ok?

Katsu:
Hmm... easier said than done. This place is dark as a pit. Oh - yatta! [Points at the old candelabra and a box of matches standing on the cupboard.]

[Cut to the narrow spiraling staircase. Flashes of lightning momentarily allow Saito to continue climbing without tripping.]

Saito:
[Mumbling to himself.] Who built this place, anyway? I mean, secret doorways can be fun - but not when they're one-way only! [Comes to an abrupt stop when he hears the ominous echoing sound.] Wh...who's there?

Voice:
NOBODY HERE BUT US GHOSTS!! Us ghosts! Us ghosts... [Echoes off. Saito starts to move when the voice resumes.] AND SOON YOU'LL BE ONE, TOO!! One, too! One, too... YOUR WORST FEAR IS AHEAD! Is ahead! is ahead...

[Saito looks ahead, into the darkness. In the flash of lightning he sees that someone - or something - is waiting for him. He can't see the features of the figure or its face - but as he moves toward it, he notices the figure is moving toward him.]

Saito:
[Clenching his teeth.] I don't know who or what you are... but I'm not afraid of you!

Voice:
BE AFRAID!! Be afraid! be afraid...

[Cut to the master bedroom. The clock strikes midnight as Kasamatsu tosses and turns, trying to get some sleep. Movement catches his attention and he opens his eyes slightly, only to suddenly come wide awake as he sees a semi-transparent figure floating in the air in the middle of the bedroom.]

Kasamatsu:
N-n-n-anda*...?!?

*What the

Ghost of Ojiisan:
Oi Teruhiko!

Kasamatsu:
O-o-ojiichan?!?

Ghost of Ojiisan:
So you thought you'd seen the last of me? I swore I'd return and get my revenge... [Menacingly as he eyes turn red and fangs grow out of his mouth.] and I've brought back a few of our ancestors to help me out!

Kasamatsu:
[Paralyzed and quivering with fear.] ...!

Ghost 1:
[Appears out of thin air and starts to converge on Kasamatsu.] Betrayer of family...!

Ghost 2:
[Appears out of thin air and starts to converge on Kasamatsu.] Dishonorable filth...!

Ghost 3:
[Appears out of thin air and starts to move laterally across the room.] Ushiko-san...!

Ghost 4:
[Appears out of thin air and starts to move towards Ghost 3.] Umao-san...!

Ghost 3:
Wherefore art thou Ushiko-san?!

Ghost 4:
Wherefore art thou Umao-san?!

Kasamatsu:
GYAAAA...!

Ghost of Ojiisan:
Are you ready to join us, Teruhiko? Are you ready? BWAHAHAHA! We're going to take you with us!

[There's a particularly loud roll of thunder. The ghosts disappear, and the room is plunged into darkness - but then the door starts opening, and a faltering yellow light creeps in.]

Kasamatsu:
...!

[The door opens wider, and two figures enter. They are dressed in white and the yellow light seems to be emanating from them.]

Figures:
[In unison.] Kasamatsu! Help us!

Kasamatsu:
GYAAA!! Go away! I can't help you!

Kasuga:
Huh?

Katsu:
We just need to know where the fuse box is!

Kasamatsu:
HUH? Is... is that you, guys?

Kasuga:
[Placing the candelabra on the table.] Yeah - who did you think we were?!

Kasamatsu:
Don't you SCARE me like that! What do you want?

Katsu:
We think that the fuse failed. Where's the fuse box?

Kasamatsu:
It's outside, in the shed, next to the coal bin by the house. Whoever goes, also should bring a flashlight and a couple of lanterns from there.

Kasuga:
Outside?! But there's a thunderstorm out!

Katsu:
Well... I guess we'll have to draw straws....

[Cut to Saito, who is slowly approaching the figure at the end of the passage. The figure is slowly moving toward him.]

Saito:
I - am - not - afraid - of - you...!

[He extends his arm to touch the figure - and it hits an obstacle.]

Saito:
A... mirror?! So - this was my own reflection?!

[He feels the surface of the mirror - when it spins on its axis and propels him into the darkness.]

[Cut to the outside. Kasuga is crossing the courtyard, approaching the shed.]

Kasuga:
[Muttering to himself.] My luck...

[He enters the shed through the side door and starts to feel his way in the darkness.]

Kasuga:
Kasamatsu said the fuse box is to the left... and the workbench with the lanterns and the flashlight should be straight ahead... and... [Suddenly, he senses the movement in the darkness.] Who's there?! [Silence. He takes a step forward - and hears an earsplitting, inhuman howl.] GAAACK!!

[Cut to the girls' bedroom. They hear a bloodcurdling howl from the outside and shiver.]

Ayukawa:
You... you know what? Maybe I should go to Kasuga-kun's room... it's... a bit scary here.

Yoko:
What? Don't tell me you're afraid!

Yuko:
Actually, I'm afraid, too. I... I think I'll go to the master bedroom. At least, Saito-san is there.

Yoko:
[Defiantly.] Well, I'm not going anywhere! I'm staying here! And do you really think your Saito-san can do anything to help you?

[Cut to the library. It's a big room, with bookcases and tapestries lining the walls. One section of the wall turns and Saito falls out from behind it.]

Saito:
[Looking around.] Wow... there must be thousands of books here! I would love to stay here and check them out... maybe later. [Runs to the door and tries the handle, with no success. Sighs] Hmm... maybe now. Let's see if this trick works here, too. [Starts trying to move books, one by one.]

[Cut to Kasuga's room. It's empty, as Ayukawa enters cautiously.]

Ayukawa:
Kasuga-kun? Where are you?

[There's no reply. She sighs and sits on the bed, to wait. Soon, she hears steps in the corridor. But the sound of the steps is not normal - they are accompanied by loud metallic noise, as if someone - or something - is rattling a chain.]

Ayukawa:
...!

[The door slowly opens, and a horrible ghost appears in front of the terrified Ayukawa. Illuminated by the flashes of lightning, it's black as night. The beam of light is coming from its mouth. With clanging noise, it approaches Ayukawa and extends a hand toward her. In this hand, it holds another head - its eyes are shining in the darkness.]

Ayukawa:
KYAAA!!! [Faints.]

[Cut to the library. Saito pulls on a particular book - and hears a noise behind him. He turns and sees a section of the wall moving away. Behind it, there is something that looks like a control console - a set of buttons, dials, levers, and monitors.]

Saito:
[Looking at the console.] Wait a minute... this is... this is...

[He pulls on the random lever. The floor opens underneath him and he plunges down.]

[Cut to the girls' room, where Yoko is alone.]

Yoko:
[Shudders as the thunder rolls outside.] Maybe... maybe I should have went with Yuko. [Claps twice, closes her eyes, holds her hands together and looks up.] Kami-sama, please send someone to protect me! A real man, like Baka-chan!

[A hatch in the ceiling opens and Saito falls out of it, landing in the bed with Yoko.]

Yoko:
[Indignantly to the ceiling.] That's not funny!

Saito:
[Jumps off the bed.] Where... where's everyone else?

Yoko:
I DON'T KNOW! They... they all left! [Narrows her eyes.] Not that you should use this situation to your advantage...!

Saito:
Who? Me? Never! [Grabs Yoko's hand.] Come on!

Yoko:
WHERE?

Saito:
To the master bedroom!

Yoko:
[Shocked.] HOW DARE YOU...!

Saito:
[Indignantly.] No, no, that's not what I meant! You see, I've discovered something - we have to talk to Kasamatsu about all this!

[Cut to the first guest room. Ayukawa is lying on the floor, with her eyes closed.]

Voice:
A...Ayukawa! Daijobu desu*...?

*Are you OK

[She opens her eyes to see Kasuga who is kneeling over her. The room is much brighter now - two big lanterns provide the illumination.]

Ayukawa:
Kasuga-kun! [Hugs him.] I was so afraid! I'm so glad you're here! I... I saw the most horrible ghost! It was reaching to me, and...

Kasuga:
[Putting his hand behind his head and laughing.] Ahhaha... umm, that wasn't a ghost, Ayukawa. That was me.

Ayukawa:
WHAT? But he was all black, and... and there was that clanging noise, and...

Kasuga:
Well, it was dark in the shed, so when I stepped on something, I fell into the coal bin. The clanging noise was from the lanterns, I guess....

Ayukawa:
But you were carrying someone's head in your hand!

Kasuga:
What? Oh, that was a cat.

Ayukawa:
What cat?!

Kasuga:
The one I stepped on in the shed. [Points on the large black cat, leisurely lying on the bed covers.] I decided to bring it here, so my hands were full, and I had to hold the flashlight with my teeth....

Ayukawa:
Ohh.... [Tenderly.] Baka mitai*.

*Idiot (politely)

Kasuga:
Umm... you're not scared now, are you?

Ayukawa:
I... I guess not. [Smiles.] I mean - you're with me, aren't you?

Kasuga:
[Smiles back at her.] I guess I should guard you until the sunrise, m'lady.

Ayukawa:
Please do, my knight... [Looks at his coal-smeared clothes.] In not-so-shining armor.

[Cut to master's room. Saito is agitatedly talking to Kasamatsu, Katsu, Yoko and Yuko.]

Saito:
... and when I see a control console, I recognize one! It had a time controller to turn off the power to the rest of the house, some audio and video tape recorders, connected to what I think is hidden loudspeakers, projectors and such stuff.

Kasamatsu:
[Slowly.] Masaka*...

*Impossible

Saito:
[Nods.] Un, that what it was. You know - I think someone is playing an elaborate practical joke on us....

[Everyone except Saito turns to glare at Kasamatsu.]

Kasamatsu:
[Indignant.] Not me! Ojiichan!

[Cut to the next morning. The company is gathered in the main hall as Aku-san puts a briefcase onto the center table.]

Aku:
Congratulations, Kasamatsu-san. You have successfully completed your grandfather's final wish. Here is your inheritance. [Packs his legal papers together.] I'll leave you to enjoy the fruits of your labors. Please lock the doors when you leave. Saraba da*. [Leaves.]

*Farewell

Kasamatsu:
At last...after all those hassles, I'm finally rich!

Saito:
Well don't keep us in suspense! Let's see it!

Miyasato-tachi:
[In unison.] Open it, open it!

[Kasamatsu opens the case and looks over the stash with anticipation. However, his enthusiasm dampens as he looks over the unfamiliar looking stash of coins and bills.]

Katsu:
[Surprised.] Nan...da...?

Kasuga:
[Shocked as he looks at one of the coins carefully.] Eh?!? These are all ryo*! They're worthless!

* See end of episode for more details.

Kasamatsu:
[Digging through the pile.] Wait...there's another tape. Maybe it'll tell us where the money is really located.

[Kasamatsu pulls the tape out, opens it, and inserts it into the cassette player.]

Tape:
"Osu Teruhiko! If you're listening to this, then you've successfully completed your stay in our family mansion. What did you think, eh? Bwahahaha...and you thought I was just some foolish old man? Let me tell you - I was listening to you all those times you explained your practical jokes and electronic gadgets and, as you can see, I put it to good use! [Triumphantly.] I promised I'd get you back and I did! Of course, it did cost me a lot of my money; what you see in front of you is all I've got left. Sorry I had to spend it all, but a promise is a promise. Of course you still get the house; I'm not that bad a guy. As for myself, my only regret I have is not being able to see your face. [Maniacally] Bwahahahahah....!"

[Everyone else looks disdainfully at Kasamatsu.]

Kasamatsu:
[Sheepishly.] Ahh...

[Cut to Kasamatsu's apartment. Kasamatsu enters the apartment, looking hunched over from fatigue. As he opens the door, he looks around and is perked up when he sees the apartment cleaner than usual.]

Kasamatsu:
[To himself.] Oh well...at least this weekend hasn't been a total loss. [To no one in particular.] Tadaima*.

*I'm home

Baka:
[Loudly.] Okaeri nasai*! <Squawk!>

*Welcome back

Kasamatsu:
[Stunned shock.] EHH...?!? Wh-what has that girl been teaching you?!?

Baka:
<Squawk!> Pauli spin-matrices ga kawaii! Ne*?!? <Squawk!>

*Pauli spin-matricies are cute! Right?!?

Kasamatsu:
[Slumps down to his knees.] Th-this has really been the worst...!


END CREDITS

New Character Designer/Writer Stephen Tsai Co-writer Vladimir Zelevinsky Pre-readers Robert Carragher Greg Dreher Herbert Fung Jeff Williamson Very special thanks to Hitoshi Doi

A tip of the hat and a deep bow to Matsumoto Izumi for starting the whole thing

If I left anyone off, my apologies. Any mistakes/embarrassing faux pas are entirely my own. If there is anything here you must flame, mail them to stsai@netcom.com.

Thank you for taking the time to read this episode of my series. I have the next episode in the works.

Hope you enjoyed it and thanks again!

For the new readers:
I'll be doing character profiles, major location descriptions, and situation updates on a rotating basis for each episode. If there is a particular character, place or event that you would like to know more about, and it is not being covered, don't hesitate to email me and I will send you either a note or a copy of the episode it is introduced.

Focus on wills:
In Japanese law, wills can determine the disposition of property or status or the execution of the will. With respect to property, a will can specify who and how an inheritance is passed to the heirs. It can also specify the presiding officer for ancestral rites. A will can acknowledge or designate someone as guardian or guardian supervisor. It may also designate an executor or may delegate authority to make such a designation.

Premodern money:
Ryo was a unit of currency in the early Edo period (1600-1868). The shogunate established a kinza or gold mint and minted oban (equivalent to 10 ryo), koban (1 ryo), and ichibukin (1/4 of 1 ryo). Chogin (silver bars) and the smaller mameitagin were minted at ginza (silver mints). Zeni coins with square holds made of copper, iron, or brass, were minted at various zeniza (zeni mints). In 1636 the mintage called Kan'ei tsuho was designated as the official zeni currency, and in 1670 the use of older coinages was proscribed. With this, the pre-modern system of gold, silver, and zeni was fully established. The various domains (han) issued paper currency (hansatsu) beginning in 1661, and by the early Meiji period (1868-1912) there were 244 domains that had their own currency. The resulting confusion was eliminated in 1871 when the Shinka Jorei (New Currency Regulation) made the Yen (equivalent to 1 ryo) the basic unit of currency. By 1879, pre-Meiji currency had been replaced completely.

JAPAN:An Illustrated Encyclopedia, Kodansha Press, Tokyo, 1994.


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